SOCIAL MEDIA - The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

 

I use Social Media (Facebook, Instagram and Youtube) quite often and have seen The Good the Bad and the Ugly sides of these platforms.

The Good

I have used Facebook to reconnect with so many old high school and college friends, past work colleagues and others from around the country and it has been fantastic. 

From Massachusetts to Florida and Texas to California and so many places in between, it’s been great to re-establish these old friendships. 

• Being invited to spend my first Thanksgiving on the road with one of my longest childhood friends, Diane and her husband Joe and family! (what a wonderful treat)
  
• Trying to paddle board in Florida with my HS pal Tom O’Brien (he’s a great teacher, I’m a horrible student)
• Going to church in California with my Westminster friend Lo-i Pan (an awesome experience)
• Going on a hike with my old work colleague Mitch Ferro in Texas
• Seeing my fraternity father Paul Bijkersma in Massachusetts 
• Hanging out a couple of times with Jeanette Chambers in upstate NY (also seeing Bob and Lisa Dreste)
• Having lunch in Florida with our Jamaica travels friends Shelly and Karl
• and so many more wonderful visits with friends around the country!

 

Sharing my journey with friends on Facebook and Instagram has been awesome. I’ve received a lot of great feedback and suggestions for places to visit. 

Some of the Facebook RV groups have been great as well, helping me troubleshoot issues with my rig and suggesting modifications I can make to make life a bit easier on the road.

YouTube and FB also allows me to connect to my home church, Cornerstone Chapel in Leesburg VA to watch the teachings from around the country and I have also connected with a great fellowship online, yourjesusjourney.com. YJJ has been fantastic, the morning devotionals are a great way to start my day and the new friends I’ve made there are a real blessing.

I've used social media to find out of the way places to visit, gather information about local events and happenings around the country, get updated information about National Parks and Forests, and so much more.

So many of the groups on FB are helpful and encouraging and awesome to share information on topics you are interested in learning more about.

So used correctly, social media has been a real useful and positive way to learn, grow and re-connect!

The Bad and The Ugly

Hateful comments, making fun of people that ask legitimate questions, name calling, sexist and racist comments are all an unnecessary and hateful part of social media.

After the recent murder of the healthcare CEO in NYC, I saw some posts that supported to murderer and also posted the names and schedules of other healthcare executives. This is really sick! Encouraging others to stalk and possibly do harm to another person is horrible and is criminal.

Keyboard warriors on social media hide behind their computers spreading hate, trying to create chaos, and working to divide our communities and our country is just UGLY!  

I’ve blocked a lot of the negativity from my feeds and that has made looking at social media so much better. I’ve gone through the groups I belong to and left the ones that are hateful/negative or just not helpful to me.

Misinformation is all over social media today. People spread false information and wild conspiracy theories that many people take as the truth. One really needs to look carefully at all the information posted to ensure that its real.

Also, the addition of Artificial Intelligence, AI, to social media brings a whole new way to spread misinformation. I’ve seen AI generated pictures of places I’ve been to that look nothing like the actual place. I just don’t understand why people insist on making these AI generated pictures because the places are so beautiful the way they really are.

I try to stay away from the BAD and the UGLY as much as possible. 

So while I love social media, I need to be diligent about what I read and see on the different platforms. Overall they have been very positive for me and my journey!

‘Howyadoin’

Growing up in the southern part of New Jersey, ‘howyadoin’ is more of a greeting than a question.

If someone says…hey, howyadoin…they aren’t typically looking for a response. Its just a greeting and if you do try to answer they will look at you with a cocked head and will probably be thinking ‘I really don’t care how he’s doing, I was just saying hi!

Now, ‘whatchadoin’ IS a question and an answer is expected, but I digress.

The other morning my buddy Greg asked me, ‘how are you doing this morning’ and I answered him…’not great, I’m in a bit of a funk since waking up’. So we talked about it and it helped a lot. 

If he hadn’t asked me that question, I probably wouldn’t have said anything and would have sat in my funk for the day.

It reminds be of the time I was in the hospital after major back surgery. I needed help with just about everything, so one evening I buzzed the nurses station and asked for assistance getting into the bathroom. My nurse, a very muscular Nigerian gentleman, came down and assisted me into the bathroom and said to buzz him again when I was done and he would assist me getting back into my bed. I did just that and he helped me standup and asked if I needed anything else. Well yes I did, I needed his help cleaning myself after using the toilet. I contemplated not saying anything but I needed his help so I asked and he did his job professionally and helped me back to bed. I figured if I didn’t ask for his help, I would have had to sit in my sh*t for the rest of the night. 

Asking for help is difficult, it can make us feel vulnerable, weak, a burden on others, uncomfortable, ashamed, etc.

Asking for help is ok!

We all need help once in a while, I need help once in a while and I’ve learned to ask for it. Asking for help doesn’t make me weak, I believe it makes me stronger. I know my limits and I know it's ok to ask for help.

So next time someone asks you 'howyadoin' let them know if you are in a funk, it will help you both!

“The person who is being asked to help also gets a huge benefit from being in that position. They are strengthening social ties and they are able to feel generous. Asking for help is quite generative for both parties.”
-Dr. Lakshmin, M.D.

I’m Right…You’re Wrong

I’ve really been struggling to write this blog entry.

There are so many things I want to write about but I keep getting stuck. I write for a while then sit back and think about what I wrote and I keep getting wrapped around the axle, so I am just going to go for it and let my thoughts flow.

It’s really sad to see our beautiful country so divided over so many things.

‘Can’t we all get along’ ~ Rodney King

Rodney King said this during the Los Angeles Riots. I was living in LA at the time and I remember sitting in front of the television watching people being beaten and buildings being burned to the ground. I sat there in my living room crying wondering how this can be happening.

The last time I remember our entire country pulling together and working together was after September 11th. 

So why can’t we all just get along and live together peacefully? Why does it take a national crisis/tragedy to get us all working together.

While living north of Los Angeles in 1994, we went through a major earthquake, lives were lost and homes were destroyed, but everyone worked together to help friends and neighbors. My neighbor down the street had a freezer full of meats and since there wasn’t going to be any electricity for a few days, he invited the entire neighborhood over for a huge BBQ. Some of the neighbors he knew and some he didn’t, he wanted to help everyone. 

During the recent hurricanes in Florida and the South East, I’m sure neighbors were helping neighbors but there was also a great deal of finger pointing. Biden and FEMA weren’t doing anything or not enough, only $700 to assist families that lost their homes, no boats or helicopters were rescuing people, etc. Finger pointing and blaming others, all while people were suffering. It became an us vs them situation all played out in the media and on social media.

It seems like we need to pick a stance and lock in…dig our heels in no matter what.

Red States vs Blue States

White vs Black

Straight vs Gay

Rich vs Poor

Christian vs non-Christian

And on and on…

I believe it's because of the I’m Right…You’re Wrong attitude so many people believe in today.  

If you don’t see things the way I see them then you are WRONG. If you don’t believe the things I believe in then you are WRONG. If you don’t look like me then you are WRONG…

How about just accepting people the way they are and agree that we are not necessarily wrong…we are just different.

My politics lean a little left of center, conservative on some things and liberal on other things. I have my beliefs but I am willing to listen to the 'other side’. Sometimes I agree with their viewpoint and sometimes I don’t, but I don’t draw a line in the sand and say I’m right and you’re wrong (I am guilty of that sometimes). Just different views, opinions and experiences. 

I am guilty of the I’m Right you’re Wrong attitude, especially during the recent election cycle.

We have two major political parties in the US, but in many ways we now have four parties, Republicans/Democrats and the extremists in both parties. The extreme left and extreme right are the dangerous groups. The extremes on both sides are the ones dividing us, making false claims about the people across the aisle. Name calling, lumping everyone on the other side into the same bucket. 

The extremists on the right call themselves PATRIOTS and make it sound like anyone not with them is not a patriot and are destroying the country. I am not part of the extreme but I am certainly a PATRIOT. The Lunatic Liberals are just as bad. 

I think we need to get back to OLD Republican and Democrat beliefs. Main stream political beliefs aren’t so bad…they served our parents and grandparents just fine.

There are some many topics that I could get into but I think I'll leave it here...‘Can’t we all get along’

I need to be better and more accepting of people that think differently than me. I need to listen more and talk less. I need to open my mind and heart to others.

I am going to work on spreading happiness and togetherness vs the I’m Right and You’re Wrong mentality.

“EMBRACE DIFFERENCES LIKE THE COLORS OF THE RAINBOW; TOGETHER, THEY CREATE A BEAUTIFUL SPECTRUM OF CONNECTION.”

~ MAYA ANGELOU